THE BLUEPRINT ERA

Two days. And I'll be honest with you, I've been looking at these rosters since July. There's no offseason for me. I just sit there with a spreadsheet and a problem.

That's sad, Kenny.

It is sad. And I'd do it again.

Can I say something? I missed these people. I missed all of 'em. I missed talking trash about guys who can't hear me. I missed Nik getting mad. I missed Rich filing paperwork. I have been waiting.

Well, the wait is over. Last season gave us the first back-to-back champion in the history of this league, the worst record ever recorded, a trade half this league still hasn't forgiven, and a final decided by twenty-six points. Gentlemen — one word on the year we just had.

Compressed. Eight teams fighting for four spots in week sixteen.

Violent.

Fraudulent. And I'll tell you exactly who I mean later.

Then let's get into it.

Gekyume's Balls won it. Xander, back to back, four straight finals appearances. He closed the regular season on eleven consecutive wins and then beat Dennis in the final, sixteen nineteen to fifteen ninety-three.

And I want to be precise about that final, because it's the whole story of last season. Dennis had Nikola Jokić — the best fantasy player in basketball, the guy he'd traded for midseason. Jokić went out and scored two hundred and eighty-three points in a championship week.

Two eighty-three. In the finals.

And he still lost. Because on the other side, Xander's best player that week was Luka at one eighty-three. Nobody on his roster broke two hundred. He won a championship without a single monster performance, just eight guys all showing up at once.

That's what's terrifying about that team. There's no one guy to stop. You can have the best player alive and it doesn't matter, because he's got no holes anywhere.

And he picked fifth. Fifth pick, no Jokić, and he beat the man who had him.

Three other things from last year that carry into this one. Rich went 13-6, finished third, and then lost a semifinal by three hundred and twenty-one points coming off a bye. Kevin made the playoffs for the first time in his career and lost a semifinal by forty-nine. And CJ went from a one percent chance of making the postseason to five straight wins and a berth.

Every one of those men is back. That's what makes this year interesting.

Three managers from last season aren't in this draft, and the reasons are different in each case.

Start with Dineen. He wasn't asked back. He went inactive in the second half of last season, and the week he beat Rich he did it while not managing his roster at all.

That's what gets you. Not losing. Not showing up. You got nineteen weeks and eleven other people counting on you to play 'em straight.

Panz is different, and I think this is worth saying clearly, because people have been speculating. He was asked back. The commissioner offered him the spot.

But the ask came with a condition — commit to the season. And he couldn't make that commitment, so the offer didn't go through. That's not a punishment. That's a man being honest about what he could give.

I respect that more than I'd respect him limping through another two and seventeen. If you know you can't do it, say you can't do it.

And the third is Bryan, who didn't pay his buy-in.

Yeah. That one's simple. Everybody else put their money in the pot.

Man pulled a reverse Ballmer. Steve Ballmer wrote a check for two billion dollars for a basketball team. This man couldn't find a hundred.

It's a shame on the floor, because he was second in the league in points scored. But trust is the whole thing in a money league, and once that's gone, it's gone.

Three chairs empty, three new people in them. Let's meet the field.

If you're new to this league, this is the part to pay attention to. Twelve teams, twelve managers, and every one of them has a name that was earned rather than assigned. Kenny, walk us through it.

We'll start with the champion. Gekyume's Balls, run by Xander. Back to back, four straight finals, and a career record of thirty-nine and seventeen, which is the best this league has ever produced. Last year we called him The Wolf. That's retired, because it never meant anything. This year he's The Blueprint — every manager in this league is now running some version of something he did first. The constant trading, the IR stashing, the long-game roster building. You don't get named after a nickname. You get named after what people copy.

That's your name for him. Mine's different. The House. As in, the house always wins, and he also happens to own the house. He runs this league and he keeps winning it. I'm not saying it's a crime. I'm saying it's a pattern.

I'm with Chuck on this one. You don't beat the house. You just leave with less than you walked in with.

Both names are on the board. Next.

Richard Milles Milles, run by Rich. He won the thing in 2024. Thirty-eight and eighteen, and he has never missed a playoff in his life. He's Mr. Consistent, and there was talk of changing it this year. There shouldn't have been. When a name is that accurate you leave it alone.

Compton Wife Beaters, run by Dennis. Thirty-seven and nineteen. Second place, third place, second place. Never won. And all three times he was eliminated, it was by the same man.

Give him the name, Ernie.

He's The Prince.

Oh, that's good.

And I want to explain why, because it matters. A prince isn't a loser. A prince is next in line. He's got the best resume of any manager in this league without a ring, and the only thing between him and the crown is one specific person. That's not a sad story. That's a succession.

The Prince trying to beat The House. We got a season already and we haven't drafted yet.

Polak, run by Kevin. He made the playoffs for the first time last year. He also put up one thousand eight hundred and twenty-two points in week seventeen, which is the highest regular season score this league has ever recorded. And then he lost a semifinal he led by two hundred.

That's where the name comes from. He got rope-a-doped. Punched himself out while the other man covered up, and got caught in the back half of the week.

So he's Foreman. And when we're being serious, he's The Contender, because he has the heaviest hands in this league and nothing on his mantle.

Kevsyphus is dead, by the way. Nobody knew what it meant. I didn't know what it meant and I said it on television for a year.

Oh My Goodness Valentine, run by Declan. Twenty-five and thirty-one career, and he faced the hardest schedule in the league last season by nine hundred and fifty points. He also ended three separate undefeated streaks.

That's the Boogeyman. I don't care what his record says. You look at your schedule, you see his name, and the whole week feels different. He ain't always good. He's always dangerous.

Giant Slayer stays as the earned one. Sleepy D is retired. That never fit a man who beat three undefeated teams.

Turning Point USA, run by Nik. Twenty-eight and twenty-eight career. Exactly even.

Exactly even. Four years of campaigning and shouting and cursing out television personalities, and the man is a coin flip.

He stays The Candidate. And Shaq named him The Filibuster on this show last season, so that one's official now.

I did say that. I forgot I said that.

Modello Time, run by Liam. Nineteen and thirty-seven, which is the worst career record of any manager with three seasons here. Started last year six and oh and missed the playoffs.

THIS. Ernie, this is who I meant. You asked me for one word about last season and I said fraudulent, and everybody at this desk looked at me like I was being dramatic. I was not being dramatic. I was being specific.

Here we go.

Six and oh. SIX AND OH. Everybody in this league is calling him a contender in October. We're sitting right here talking about his ceiling. And then he goes nineteen and thirty-seven over three seasons, misses the playoffs with the hottest start in the league, and loses on the final day to a man who wasn't even logging in.

That's the part that's hard to defend. The talent was there. The management wasn't.

That's what the word means. A fraud isn't somebody who's bad. Everybody respects somebody who's bad and knows it. A fraud is somebody who looks like the real thing right up until the moment it counts. That's the whole definition.

And here's what we learned this week. We've been calling him an insurance guy for two seasons. He isn't. He's an auditor, sitting for the CIA exam.

The what?

Certified Internal Auditor.

Mm-hmm. Sure it is.

Shaq. Don't.

So the name comes from his own profession. In auditing, when there's substantial doubt that an entity can keep operating, you flag it as a going concern. Every season, right around week eleven, this panel has flagged exactly that.

He's The Going Concern. And when he drops a week he had no business dropping, that's a material weakness — a control failure severe enough that errors don't get caught. Which is the technical term for not using your waivers.

That's the meanest thing ever said on this program and it came out of Kenny.

Tampa Jits, run by Dom. Twenty-nine and twenty-seven. Drafted a superteam last year and watched eight players get hurt at once in week five, which produced a six hundred and forty-six point week.

Ghost of Tampa stays. One of the best names we ever came up with.

And the curse gets its own name now, because every single player he traded for last season got hurt on arrival. He's Patient Zero.

Steven Hawkings Pit Crew, run by CJ. Fourteen and twenty-four career, but the shape is what matters: four and fifteen, then ten and nine and a playoff berth from one percent odds. Youngest manager in this league. Also the tallest.

Growth Spurt. That's the name. Covers the height, covers the age, covers the fact that he's gotten better every year he's been here. And I picked against that kid every single week of his win streak and I was wrong every single time.

The Prodigy stays for when we're being serious. The Underclassman is retired. He's a three-year veteran.

Tom's Reilies, run by Tom. And this one surprised us. He went three and fifteen in 2024, disappeared for two full seasons, and returns Friday with the third overall pick.

Three and fifteen and he comes back to a top-three seat? Who'd he call?

He's The Revenant. The word means one who returns. He's not new. He's resuming.

And that leaves two. Osama Bin Ballin, run by Gaven, drafting eighth. Straw Hat Pirates, run by Matthew Kolano, drafting twelfth. Neither has a nickname, a philosophy or a tagline, and neither is getting one from this desk until they earn it on the floor.

That's deliberate, and it's the most interesting thing about this season to me. We haven't had a blank page in this league in two years.

Can I say something about these two, though? Because we spent the first ten minutes of this show talking about guys who didn't show up. Two seats opened because people went quiet. And these two? They ain't even drafted yet and they're the loudest people in that group chat.

It's true, and I don't say nice things, so enjoy it. Both of 'em have been in there every single day. And Gaven's already talking smack. Hasn't played a game. Hasn't drafted a player. Already talking.

And Kolano's talking more than him\! The twelfth pick is the loudest man in the building and the draft hasn't happened.

And that's a real signal. I know it's not a stat, but I've been doing this a long time — engagement in October is the single best predictor of whether somebody's still managing their roster in February. You can teach strategy. You can't teach caring.

Both of them came in and immediately treated this like it mattered.

That's all you can ask. You don't gotta be good right away. Nobody's good right away. Just be there. And they been there.

If the early indicators hold, I think these are going to be two good teams and two good members, and I mean that. We're genuinely excited to get to know these guys.

Which brings me to my prediction. I'm making it right now, before anybody's drafted a single player. Kolano makes the playoffs. First year, twelfth pick, nobody's ever heard of him. He's in.

Six of twelve make the playoffs, Chuck. That's a coin flip. That's not a prediction, that's a weather report.

Fine. Fine\! He makes the playoffs and he finishes ahead of somebody who's been in this league three years. How's that? That specific enough for you?

Now you've done it.

He does this every year. Last year it was Dineen, and he was wrong for nineteen straight weeks.

Yeah, but last year I was betting on a man who stopped logging in. This year I'm betting on somebody who hasn't stopped talking. That's a different bet.

That's the most reasonable thing you ever said on this program.

Don't get used to it.

Friday night, eight thirty eastern. Here's how it goes.

Rich at one is the headline. He's gone eleventh, tenth, third, and now first. Four straight years of improvement, ending at the top of the board.

Which is hilarious for reasons we're spending an entire episode on tomorrow night.

Ernie, say the thing.

Dennis drafts ninth.

Say how many times.

All four seasons this league has existed.

ALL FOUR.

Tomorrow. Full episode, nothing but the draft order and what the Records Department pulled. Bring a notepad.

And look at where the champion is picking. Sixth. His slot has gone second, third, fifth, sixth — worse every single year he's been in this league — and he's won the last two titles from the back half of the board.

The house don't need a good seat. That's the whole point of being the house.

So that's where we stand, two days out. Xander is going for three straight, and nobody had ever won two in a row before he did it. Dennis is making his fourth run at the same door. Rich holds the number one pick and a theory about who's rigging this thing. Kevin has the hardest punch in the league and nothing to show for it. Declan is somewhere on your schedule. And two men nobody has a nickname for are about to find out what this league does to new people.

Twelve managers. Nineteen weeks. One trophy.

And a thousand dollars.

And Kolano makes the playoffs. Write it down. Put a date on it.

Tomorrow night we're back with the Draft Order Special. The Records Department has been digging through every draft this league has ever held, and what they found is going to make at least one man in this league very uncomfortable. We'll also go seat by seat and speculate on who each manager takes Friday — who's reaching, who's got a plan, and who's about to get the player he shouldn't.

That's the fun part. Two days out, everybody still thinks their board is right.

Everybody's undefeated right now.

Not for long.

Welcome back, everybody. It has been a long six months and we are glad to be sitting here again. For Kenny Smith, Charles Barkley and Shaquille O'Neal, I'm Ernie Johnson. The 2026-27 FBCU season starts now.